Wednesday, 22 January 2014

OGR - Script to Screen

Storytelling & Commission From Script to Screen

1 comment:

  1. OGR 24/01/2014

    Hi Sam,

    Hmmm - I've got a few issues with this - principally the really lame use of the deckchair - as the subject of an oil painting? Really? Even you don't sound too convinced in your outline. That's a classic use of a 'non-use' of a story component, because, let's face it, that deckchair could be replaced with any other object and it wouldn't make any difference to your story.

    It seems to me that you're missing an obvious connection between the idea of your 'retired superhero' (which I like) and that tricky deck-chair. Isn't the deck-chair entirely symbolic of leisure time - of people with lots of time on their hands - doesn't it conjure images of old people snoozing peacefully in the sunshine? An old man in a deckchair is a very visual way of signalling retirement. I was thinking of your 'art gallery too' - and wondering if you could put it in a more domestic setting and make a 'bat cave' joke. Imagine this scenario for a moment: ACT 1 - we encounter an old man, ordinary-looking, in his first week of retirement. In a series of quick scenes, we see him doing lots of little retirement like tasks - putting a ship in a bottle, doing a jigsaw, watching daytime telly blah. What we notice is that this character is getting bored and looking a bit glum. Next scene - he's in his immaculate, boring garden and he's trying to put up a deck-chair - and failing. He gets more and more frustrated. Finally, he gives up in frustration and goes inside; where we see him press a button; the floor slides up, we drop down into a 'bat cave' style space, and we see the character go into a gallery of artefacts that relate to his prior life as an action superhero... he walks amongst it. We see him happy and sad as he reflects on his decision to retire. He see a newspaper headline in a frame that reads 'Captain X Retires!' He makes a decision. Back in the garden - he looks at the trouble-some deckchair - and then he blows it into smithereens with his laser vision (or whatever) and we watch him fly upwards. Final shot - we're back in the gallery; the camera moves to another framed newspaper that reads 'Captain X is Back!'

    Okay - I've just written this very quickly, but do you see here how the deck-chair is of essential importance now in terms of telling us something about your character. Your story doesn't change very much really in terms of your character reliving his triumphs, but you've now got a story about 'purpose' as opposed to plot in which a man rescues a balloon... Discuss!